Adhering to the paradox of the quest to air “Dirty Laundry” while at the same time sweeping the past and its pain under the proverbial rug is a sure-fire way to deny your own individual evolution – your own personal enlightenment. It is not an authentic way to live your life. It is a painful [...]
In this complicated and fast-paced world of ours each and every one of us really needs to make a conscious and aware choice to be who he or she really is. This is a choice to search for, find, and nurture authenticity within your being. Choosing to be who you really are can mean stretching [...]
Any story you tell yourself about who you are, any belief you have, any feeling you are aware of, is only an object of your larger consciousness. You, in your essence, are always something that experiences all these and remains more complete than any of them. When you realize that you are inherently larger than [...]
Self-mutilation, for many who have Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD), is a learned language of profound pain. It is a primordial scream for help. It is
the apex of needing to be heard, validated, and soothed. It is one of the most
prolific and anguished expressions of borderline pain, pain that has otherwise been abandoned. It is self-defeating and holds you hostage to the pain of the false self – to the pain that you can’t heal by further wounding and re-wounding your body and your precious soul.
Self mutilation is the way many with BPD transfer the abandoned pain of BPD from its deep intra-psychic (subconscious) roots to the light of day. Borderlines channel this intolerable emotional pain that they do not know how to cope with into physical pain which is much more understandable. Borderlines understand suffering. The self abuse of self mutilation takes the borderline’s abandonment trauma (Masterson) from the mind to the body. Borderlines use their bodies to express what is too unsafe and what feels annihilating to even begin to absorb in a conscious psychological way. Sadly, however, this transfer of psychological pain into physical pain does nothing to actually begin to get in touch with abandonment trauma in ways that can mean learning, through therapy, to learn the skills necessary to first tolerate the distress of the pain, and then secondly, work at resolving it.
Life is hectic and getting more hectic by the minute. The demands on our time just seem to keep increasing. We are living in fast-paced narcissistic times. Times that are mirrored to us in often distorted ways by the continued information, electronic, and technological explosion that is continuously proliferating leaving us all in some ways [...]