Life coach and author, A.J. Mahari, talks about the nature of toxic guilt that is born in and out of caretaking for the emotions and feelings of someone else while not taking care of one’s own emotions or feelings. This enmeshed, toxic, and codependent way of relating leaves many people not only being abused and victimized but also feeling guilty about that – feeling like some how they’ve done something to make their abuser abuse them. Toxic relationships do not contain healthy love. Toxic relationships block your personal growth, self improvement, and your ability to feel worthy enough to claim your own happiness.
Emotional dysregulation is a term often applied to the emotional experience of people diagnosed with Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD) It is not limited to those with BPD, or even those who have any form of mental illness. Even people considered to have average mental health can and do experience emotional dysregulation. It is the absence of the practice and ability to live in and through emotional mastery.
Most people when they realize they are in a toxic relationship, at some point or other, come to the conclusion they have made a mistake. A mistake that is likely a series of mistakes in reality. This is a crucial fork in the road of your understanding actually. This point of painful realization is a [...]
More often than not what sustains the foundation of toxic relating inside of a person is a personality disorder or some other form of mental illness. Borderline Personality and Narcissistic Personality Disorder are the two most common sources of toxic and abusive relating. Both personality disorders seem to be on the increase. We also seem to be living in what are very narcissistic times.
Toxic relationships are everything that defies the word relationship. They are not about love – they are about relationship addiction – being addicted to chaos, drama and/or the other person. They are not desirable. They are painful. They are compelling in that given certain unresolved emotional issues from childhood, adults frankly get addicted to toxic relational schema. These toxic relationships are the vehicles of verbal abuse, physical abuse, and often domestic violence.