Wait – The Lessons of The Traps of Toxic Relationships
Be willing and prepared to wait for what you most want and need. Trust that the winds that blow in your life today have purpose. Learn to wait.
You can and will save yourself from so much unnecessary pain if you learn to wait and to proceed more slowly with caution in life. Trust your instincts always. Do not be fooled by what feels familiar. Often what is most familiar beckons you back to unfinished painful past issues and is not the love you seek at all.
Wait out those impulses to jump into things or relationships with people when it all feels so familiar. Wait.
Waiting is a sacred time of unfolding preparation for what is to come. Waiting is an important part of the process of change, healing, recovery and the increased awareness that will gift you with the enlightenment that you most need in your life today. Trust that.
Learn to be okay with being alone. Learn to value your precious sacred self. Unlearn the negative associations society has taught us all about what it means to be alone. Sometimes, being alone, is the only way to heal, to recover, to learn the lessons that help us to not continue to make the same painful mistakes. Learn to wait. Learn to be alone.
Waiting is not a passive reality. As we wait for some things to become more clear, as we wait to find our way through loss, pain, grief, anger, or remorse, we must take healing and life-changing action. The first step on this ladder of growth is taking responsibility for wherever you are today. If you hurt – hurt. If you are in pain – radically accept that pain. If you are grieving – grieve. If you are angry – allow yourself to have healthy constructive anger. Wherever you are in your life today, right this minute, radically accept it and surrender to all it is that you cannot control. Control yourself. Tend to your own emotions. Go within and find out who you are as you wait for the lessons to teach you what you need to know to take you to where you are meant to go.
Be patient. Trust the process. Have faith. Sit with the reality that is your unfolding life right now. Sit with the heartache, sit with the sadness, sit with the insecurity, sit with the fear, sit with the anxiety. Be one with all you feel in true acceptance of it all. For this is the gateway to the change that you know you need. This is the gateway to the enlightenment you so seek.
Relief comes when you tend to the lessons contained within the vortex of your pain and discontent. You will only find pain in rushing into things with others. You will be wide-open and vulnerable to toxic people, toxic relationships, and toxic relating if you do not take your time, heed and assess any red flags, and sit with what your instincts warn you about what you feel. Wait. Heed your instincts.
Do what you can today with what you have. Let go of all of your yesterdays and grieve their pain and loss but then turn to today, to this very moment and all that it seeks to offer you as you wait for more understanding and clarity.
In my waiting I will continue to seek. I will take the action that I can to effect the change that is being revealed to me in my life. I will take personal responsibility for where I am today. I am responsible for how I feel. I am responsible for any and all choices I have made or failed to make.
If you are in a toxic relationship and you want to create change and healing in your life begin by taking necessary action to free yourself and then by being nurturing and gentle to and with yourself as you wait for your lessons and as you grieve. Do not judge yourself. You are doing the very best that you can with what you know.
Today, in the action of radical acceptance, I surrender to all that it is that life asks me to wait for.
© A.J. Mahari – All rights reserved.